January/February Q&A with LifeQuake Doctor Toni Galardi

Dear Dr. Toni:

I have been a psychotherapist for twenty years and I am in burnout. I like the contribution I make to my patients, but I am starting to get bored with sitting in an office all day working one on one. Although I have been a recovering alcoholic for fifteen years, I am finding myself spending a lot of time on Facebook and YouTube. People are starting to talk about social media addictions in the addiction field, and I just wondered if you thought there was a link between my boredom and my new “hobby.” Your thoughts?

Jenny

Dear Jenny:

I think there is a big link between your career burnout and after-work activities. In my LifeQuake model, I discuss that the first stage of change is often accompanied by boredom. Boredom is a transition emotion on the “emotional tone” scale. If you address it by going into “inquiry and observation” as to what things interest you now—rather than focusing on what doesn’t—you can begin to discover clues to your next vocation.

Since becoming a licensed psychotherapist, I have had several careers that are offshoots of my profession. I became a professional speaker and workshop leader first. Then I became a talk show host; taught psychology courses at a private college; studied Jungian astrology, which I still use to assist me in working with my clients; wrote a self-help book called The LifeQuake Phenomenon; became an organizational consultant to treatment facilities, teaching them change management tools; and then I became an advice columnist. Now I am a guest expert to media outlets on helping the world thrive in the midst of economic and climactic upheaval.

None of this required more schooling or licensing. It did require, in the words of Joseph Campbell, “following your bliss.” I chose to pay attention to what was pulling me in a certain direction and then explored it to see if I felt inspired to create something there. The key is to spend time every day in meditation and contemplation and ask to be shown a message or synchronicity. If you are open, to use the words of Joseph Campbell again, “a door will open that would not open for anyone else.”

Dear Dr. Toni:

I’ve been reading your column for several months in my shrink’s office and thought I would write this question: I am a transgender man who has had a wife for many years. I am on a police force somewhere in the Midwest. Perhaps because I crossed over from being a woman to being a man, I have not received a lot of the discrimination that I see in those women who were born male by gender. I love my job but am feeling the desire to do advocacy for transgender children. They go through such a difficult time in childhood, and I would like to educate parents on embracing their children’s desire to cross gender. Is there a market for this? Do you have any ideas for me to get started?

Thanks, “Gerry”

 Dear Gerry: Gender identity disorder in children is becoming identified as a growing issue in America. More and more children are declaring themselves as the opposite sex and not outgrowing it. I would do some research and watch YouTube videos. Several talk shows are addressing gender confusion in children these days. Then blog an advice or information column and send your blog to parenting websites and to those dedicated to gay and lesbian issues, as well as to transgender adults. If you get a response, it might be a way to set up a website and then a coaching business dedicated to transgender issues. Having a niche this specific could provide a needed service to educate concerned parents. Good luck!

Dear Readers: I am beginning a new teleclass series that will help you build greater resilience and centeredness. This can be an opportunity to design a life that fulfills your greatest potential self even if it currently feels a bit chaotic. I hope you will join me on this exciting adventure.

Please go to my website at http:// www.lifequake.net to sign up. If you have a burning question regarding your LifeQuake, write me at DrToni@ LifeQuake.net and you will be considered for the column. For those seeking a private consult with Dr. Toni, I can be reached through my office at 310- 890-6832.

Dr. Toni Galardi is a licensed psychotherapist, public speaker, and the author of the book, The LifeQuake Phenomenon: How to Thrive (not just survive) in Times of Personal and Global Upheaval. The LifeQuake Pheneomenon can be purchased through her website www.lifequake. net or online bookstores. Dr. Galardi will be giving a teleclass beginning Nov. 2 for 6 weeks. Go to http:// www.lifequake.net  to sign up

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